Called blue this morning.
Why I did that?! because I'm an asshole.
Worst, I send him an email last night:


Hola!! seems the only way I would be able to reach you from now on is writting you emails, it's
a pitty both of us have such a busy life. I really enjoyed having you around. You are the first friend
I made in, mmm, about 2 years, most of my G "friends" are my ex's friends, so I don`t feel comfortable
hanging with them, besides, they usually in groups behave more like a flock of "birds" than the men they are, and well, for me that's a "No, No".

Well, I can wait till I have the chance to see you in person again, but, could be days before that,
and I wanted to tell you something, I really like you, you are a very special man, a fine boy, talking
about role models jajaja, I love your independence, I barely could handle the concept of being alone
when my relationship ended, since when I decided to go out and know someone and initiate a relationship, Love wasn't in my mind, it was just having someone to share with, and then love hits, and I'm in this maelstrom, then the betrayals, the jealousy, it was bad for sure, but I at least survived it, the gravity of love, as the song sings. I thought I won't seek a new partner after that, but, the void is only comparable to the void I felt after I stop going to church, it's almost as big.

Hey, thanks for sharing a part of your life with me, it's the first time I don't feel the pressure of hiting in someone, that was so weird, more since you are so damn cute, but at least the chit chat with you, the little events, for me it was very very special.

I realized, that feeling lonely is not a reason to sought a partner, and that exactly what I was doing till the moment I meet you, after all, there you are, you, your cat, your life, complete, I guess I have to learn to love myself a little more, not living in functiong of someone else. If you can, I can.

Tks for that Blue, te quiero mucho.


...



Fuck, All that words and the most important part
was the "Te quiero mucho" stuff.
I really needed to say him that, well, at least I wrote it. Hope he find time to read it.

Bene, T. wants me to return to him.
The path is getting narrower.
Someone should have written a book like "How to learn to love yourself in one week"

K's commentary: Seahorses are known to have a single partner for life.